"Now I can say I've seen it all"!
There’s no question that 2020 has been a unique year to say the least. But things have now gone completely mad as the Presidential election looms closer. What can only be described as 'pandemonium', as Vince McMahon use to say during a WWF match, has occurred this morning outside Joe Biden's home in Delaware.
We were driving on our way to interview Vice President Biden at his home to discuss his debate prep plans. That is when we go the phone call directly from the Former VP. He gave the #HonestTimes this exclusive statement.
These are Biden's exact words on the events that happened:
I had just brought out the lemonade and set it on the table in my front lawn for us to have a nice chat about my preparations for the big debate. I saw this large stretch limousine screech to a halt in front of my house.
Photo Below: Pelosi nearly transformed earlier this month during a session of the House.
Out pops Nancy Pelosi. I was surprised. "Hi Nancy", I said with a smile. What happened next is...well... I still can't believe what happened. She ran towards me like #UsainBolt in an #Olympic Track meet. "I can't let you do it Joe", she shrieked as she made a B-line right for me and my security team. Then like she leaped into the air with tiger like precision, clear over my personal bodyguard, and then tacked me to the ground.
"Joe, you can't debate #Trump. He's going to eat you for lunch", she cried as she wrested me to the ground. "You don't stand a shot. Say your sick. Say you need a nap. Just make up a damn excuse, Joe." Secret service men attempted to peel the Speaker Pelosi off of me but she threw them like rag dolls.
"It was like a scene out of some super villain movie. She man handled us like toys", said Biden's personal security guard, Limpy Wristlet. "She was unstoppable".
In one quick move Pelosi fipped me over so I was face first into the dirt, with my hands behind my back, and she was kneeling on my neck. I straggled out, "I can't breath".
"Stop, or I'll shoot", said Smith Wesson, head of security for Biden as he aimed his gun. "This is your last warning." Pelosi then opened her mouth wide. These long pointed fangs emerged to replace her dentures. Her ears grew to a point, her skin began to spot, and her nails became sharp like razors. That is when we realized Nancy Pelosi's true self is non-other than, #Cheetah, #WonderWoman's arch enemy.
Art Rendering below of Cheetah by: Jeffrey Epstine
Shots were fired by Wesson and the rest of the agents, but the bullets bounced off of her tough hide. "I was stunned", said Smith. "I mean, she's 80 something, and she was as fast as a kitten with bullet proof leather skin. "Now I can say I've seen it all"!
She was ready to strike the final bite to me, when we heard what sounded like a plane. It was Wonder Woman in her clear jet. She had come to save me.
"Roar", said the cat like figure of Pelosi, "we meet again", as she jumped off of my back. I ran like hell for cover.
"And for the last time Cheetah Pelosi", said Wonder Woman. I'm not going to let you 'Cheetah' the #American public any more. (That's a long time to make you wait for the pun but it was worth it.)
"Take this", hissed Pelosi as she vomited acid hair balls at Wonder Women. Then, Cheetah Peolsi ran into the woods.
"Wonder Women came over to me and gave him a kiss on the cheek. It totally made Jill jealous. Then she took off after Cheetah Pelosi" said Biden.
Biden continued, "I was taken to the hospital and treated for minor injuries. My Dr. gave me a note that I'm not allowed to debate Trump. Sorry."
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